Another year has gone by, and I’m another year older. It’s my birthday. As I look back over the past year, I come across things that I think the younger generation should know. Vital information. Here are my top 10 gems of knowledge.
1. Get your car tags renewed. Keep up with when they go out of date. Even if you’ve been driving around for a year with them expired, you’ll get caught eventually. Trust me on this.
2. Drink coffee. I got into drinking coffee in college to help me stay awake for all night design parties, also known as homework. I hated it at first. Now I go to bed early out of excitement, knowing that I can drink coffee when I wake up. Plus you won’t look like a goob when you visit a coffee shop and order a water. You can go ask a friend, “Hey, you want to go grab some coffee?” See, that kinda sounds productive, right? Even if you leave work for a sec, you can just say “Oh yeah we’re just going to go grab some coffee. We’re gonna be ready to WORK when we get back. Watch out.” It’s like you’re going to fill up your car with jet fuel. Don’t be that guy who says, “Hey, you want to go grab a water?”
3. Eat cereal while you can. Your body will eventually turn on you. Plus, I think there is something childlike about eating cereal. I think we all need to connect with our inner child more than we do anyway.
4. Drink water. After you’re done drinking COFFEE, drink water. You can get kidney stones. Again, trust me on this. Your body needs it.
5. Don’t sit on the sides in an IMAX theater. Try your best to sit near the middle. If you find yourself to the extreme left or right, you’re probably going to have no idea what’s happening on screen.
6. Don’t sell crack. If you’re a crack dealer and you’re reading this, first thing, thank you. Second thing, stop it. I still remember an episode of In The Heat Of The Night where a girl smokes crack and then goes crazy. Poor decision. Don’t do it.
7. Pigs can’t look up. Seriously. If you need to sneak up on one, just climb a tree and wait for it to walk by.
8. Don’t touch an armadillo. At least don’t touch a live one. Those things are gross. I’ve also learned that some people have never seen one in the wild. That’s weird. Go google one now.
9. Learn to parallel park. You’ll most likely end up in a situation where you need to do it. I had to learn the hard way on a busy street in Nashville.
10. Work hard. If you don’t know how to do something, don’t be afraid to ask questions. Embrace the struggle. You’ll end up learning more than you thought you would by the time you’re done. The experience isn’t just going to magically pop into your head. You have to grind through it. Plus with the internet, you basically have the world showing you how to do what you’re interested in. I’ve learned a ton of stuff just by watching tutorials online. Take the time. Work hard.